Jess (*Mad*): There is only ONE THING u can do to make this better. and YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS. (aka. massage my damn back for hours)
Felix: Put my head down and fall asleep? --- (pretends to fall asleep and snores)
then he did fall asleep.
While I'm procrastinating.. here's another one.
So in church the pastor was talking about the locust swarms....
Pastor: Does anyone know what a Locust is?
Felix: Oh I love to eat that stuff with rice... and soup.
Felix: You know... it tastes pretty good.
Jess: Are you talking about lotus root?
Felix: Oh yeah... whoops......
Felix: thank god one of us reads books for the both of us.