It's been an extremely difficult semester teaching. Many times I questioned myself as a teacher.. as a person, broke down and thought that I would be a terrible teacher and that I should change my profession, but ultimately broke through and made myself stronger. My teacher is an incredibly difficult one. She's like the scary mama that you want to impress. She judges every move you make. Is stern. And on a couple occasions, if a child is shaking his pen on his hands, she will pick it up and throw it on the floor. lol She wasn't easy to work with because most days I felt like I was doing the wrong thing, but I DID IT!!!! She's one of those teachers you look back on and you really appreciate her for all that she's done... but in the moment you are SHAKING!
Yesterday they had a whole party dedicated to my leaving. I was showered with flowers, pictures of the class, gifts from the class and individual gifts from the students... and LOTS of baked goods. First they gave me a class picture that they decorated and signed, then they gave me a huge envelope filled with cards that they wrote, and then they went around in a circle and said what I mean to them. Some were just so heart felt and wonderful, it made me want to cry. Then they gave me a $50 giftcard to william and sonoma and then cheered for my engagement... and then asked if I was going to invite them to the wedding (LOL no shame).
Lastly, they were to give me advice on what to do if I had troubled student or a crazy class in my future years. . . and one kid said, "no matter how terrible the kids get sometimes (because we know that sometimes we are), never stop believing in yourself and never forget how amazing of a teacher you are." And one kid said, "If your kids are bad, threaten to send them to Ms. S (my cooperating teacher), that will surely shut them up" LOLL!
When I got home, I read some of their cards and I began to remember why I love doing this... because in the process you don't think you are doing anything... you feel scared and u feel like you'll never get through the curriculum... how are the kids going to learn? You wonder all these thoughts in your mind, but then in the end, when you read these letters from the kids... you realize... you do this because you are making a difference in their lives. Maybe they aren't quite learning academically, but you are helping to shape who they are and how they will turn out. It's funny how I'm learning all this through my kids... it's a growing process for all of us!
This is what one of my kids wrote:)
"i felt so lucky every time u came to work with me one on one. You have a way of making us feel good about ourselves and helping to give us confidence in our work. You are truly a fantastically amazingness of a person. YOU ROCK!"